Death to Comparisons and Jumping into the Deepend

I've been slacking in the writing, but I have not been slacking in the Yoga department.



Comparison: What I want, what I can.

One thing my yoga practice has brought into clear resolution is the tendency to compare. To compare everything; how am I doing against the video, how am I doing compared to the person next to me in class.  Comparing the clothes I'm wearing, the food I'm eating, the life I'm living, and so on and so on.  BUT I'm done with it....(with exception to these last photos posted) At least I'm saying that... if I can catch my brain before the next compare happens.

Sometimes it sounds like  Yoga-Speak, because it is, BUT its a recurring theme that you will hear in class, on a video, someone will say, to "Keep your focus on your practice". Don't worry about what someone else is doing, its your journey... etc etc." It's 100% true, and the ego wants me to be Luke Skywalker with Yoda balanced on my foot, but Star Wars is not quite my yoga-reality.  Crazy as this may sound, it's not wise to be delusional.  You'll either deceive yourself, deceive others, get hurt, or all three. You need to push into what is possible, but not injure or hurt!  Constantly comparing has become an all encompassing ill of society, and I've decided to drop out!

Comparison: How I want my hips to be...and how they are!

So I got even more bold.  I went out to another yoga studio and took a Heated Vinyasa Yoga Class.  It was at Invoke Studio at 86th and Ditch. http://invokestudio.com/   Despite walking in like a GIANT fish out of water,  I was welcomed and given a quick tour by Amy, the owner... which was good, cause I might have ended up hiding out in a Chiropractors room.  When I initially went to do group yoga, it was at 5:30 in the morning... that right there cuts down the possibilities of too high of an attendance.  But this class was at 7:00 pm on a Wednesday, primetime!   Even though I was there early, I walked into the 90 + degree room, and the back of the class was FULL.  Only spot was right up front! So nothing to do but roll out my mat right in the front and prepare.  The instructor got us settled in and and suggested that we release the "apprehension we may have about tonight's practice", which lead me to more apprehension. But we quickly got up to speed, Rag doll, cobra, down dog, the progressions combined with the hot humid room, turned me into a pool of sweat. You could say, I maybe was a little in the deep end but I gutted it out.  In 20 years, that one session, was the only experience I have ever had that was reminiscent of a wrestling practice.  (Just no other guys trying to grab your legs, which is a good thing) Sometimes, I look at the running training I do... and laugh at myself thinking about how that 17 year old kid would laugh at this fat bastard trying to stretch out.  Perspective sucks! This was one of those times.  But it was completely invigorating.  Like my first thought was when will I be back for more heat! Yoga's either getting into me, or I'm just a glutton for physical punishment!



I remember when this was the warm-up.  Damn

In the end, that mantra of minding your own personal space, yada yada yada, really holds true.  Frankly, if you CAN concentrate on something else other than that class, you're probably insane!;-) It finally ended, everyone gathered up their stuff, cleaned up and headed on there way. No judgement, no funny looks, it was cool! The best way to describe it, is having that slightly groggy, beat-up feeling after a massage, knowing you're going to feel awesome in a little bit, however, the massage just happened with 25 other people all trying to walk out one hallway.  I took another class at Invoke called Yin Yoga, basically you go slower through poses....much slower.... like 3 to 5 minutes.  And its not the easy ones, like child's pose, or corpse pose.  No... its big stretch poses, for someone with super tight quads.  At one point we did something that would look similar to the old hurdler stretch you remember from gym class. (Reclining Half hero)  Now you have to keep in mind over the course of my athletic career, I've sprained my left ankle at least 10 times.  Mostly happening in tennis, I think I spent the spring of my senior year in an air cast while playing.  And its only progressed as I got into this crazy running thing.  So lets just say that ankle has next to zero mobility.  If you look at the demo picture above, you'll see that ankle tucked in there pretty good.  Well, with the help of a cushion behind my back I got in position.  Lets just say, I could "feel" the fiery white light of God  bursting from that joint!  I've never breathed so seriously in my life.  Nothing to say, but I moved myself through some uncomfortableness... and that's growth! One day I'm going to look like that picture! DAMN... another comparison!!!

Side notes:



The Yogi of In-N-Out Burger

Physical:  Its hard to take full inventory of how things are going.  My running is really ramping up, so its hard to gauge, but I think the yoga is making recovery a little more progressive. Core is definitely getting stronger.  Anything I have to do where I support all my weight on one limb... arm, leg, I suck.  Still needs some serious work.  Weight wise, I'm down about 12 lbs. from Christmas.  So all in all, still good progress.

Mental:  Granted its the time of year where my work picks up, so again, probably reading a little too much into it, but concentration is better as well as creative energy.   I think I'm listening to others better, again, probably my own bs thought, but sometimes I sense myself trying to hone in a little better.  So, we'll take it.

Spiritual:  Other than the light of Christ emanating out of my jacked up ankle, the physical yoga practice seems to quiet everything down.  And as Lori mentioned one day, a main intent of yoga is to be able to "sit"/ meditate/pray for extended periods of time.  I find my ability to stay still has expanded. 

Until next time...